Wednesday, May 27, 2009

ok well I haven't kept things up

Well things happen. You know what I'm tired of paying off my parents house. It sucks. All of my paycheck goes to them and I haven't seen a dime. I'm trying to get a new job but no one is hiring. I am so annoyed that maybe it might be better if I wasn't around.  I know that is the frustration talking but its so damn hard. I haven't got a good job yet. All the jobs I have are just retail. I hate retail but I really pretend that I like it and I get more sales that way. The jobs that want me is sales jobs and I'm DONE with sales. I want to do something that won't give me any weekends or work earily in the morning or at least come home at a decent hour. It sucks. I beg to God that he will point me to the right direction into this new job. I know that I have to do it myself but God usually guides me.  Maybe I should become a teacher. I would like a full-time job with no sales involved. Is that too hard to asked.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

food journal 1

Ok maybe I should have started this yesterday but I forgot so sue me.
May 11
breakfast
  1. peanut butter and jelly sandwich
  2. coffee with cream and splenda
lunch
  1. Doritos
  2. 2 Grandmother Cookies
  3. Wild Cherry Pepsi
Dinner
  1. Crab cake
  2. Chips and spinach dip
  3. Ginger Ale
May 12
Breakfast
  1. peanut butter and jelly sandwich toasted
  2. coffee with cream and splenda
Lunch
  1. Chicken pasta
  2. Finished the wild cherry soda
Dinner ??? for now

journal entry 1

Hello from the other side of the screen. If you probably notice I have started typing in this blog because I believe I need a change in my life. I need to change how I feel about myself, situations that happen, and about the jobs I'm about to peruse. Right now I feel like I'm in a rut. What do I need to do to get out of this rut. Here is some problems that are facing me now.

I believe I am overweight. The last time I weight myself was back in last September which I weigh 173 (I think). I went for my annual checkup and gave me new prescription of birth control. Now I don't think I should blame the birth control because I was heavier before.

Another situation is my job. My job is boring and there is no challenge in what I do. I sell watches for the people who don't know and its just getting ridicules on how early I have to open the store and how late I have to close the store. It takes me at least 2 hours to get to and from work. If my husband drives me to work he has to get up early also but driving takes about 30- 45 minutes. To top it all off the job is not paying for my travel expensive. I am working for minimal wage which is now 9.00 per hour, I have not seen a pay raise and I used to get more from my previous job.

The last situation is my faith in the catholic church. Which scares me. There was an incident that happen to me that makes me question the church in NY. Well at this church I asked them if I they have classes of being a god parent and what I need to do to become one. The person there said yes and I should meet with her. It was a nice discussion but when she asked me if I got married in a church and I said no she said that the church wouldn't recognize me as a parishioner or as a god parent. Also she told me that I'm not connected with God because I'm not married in a church. After that she told me that I could have the wedding at this church for 500 dollars. And that her sister owns a wedding dress store and could give me a good price on it. She also said that we can have all your family and friends over at the church basement for the wedding reception. After she told me that I started to cried because I was so angry on what she told me. After that I started to question the church.

Now what do I need to do to get out of this rut. I made a promise to myself that would make a food and workout journal so I could keep track on what I'm doing. Another promise is finding a new job. I really need to find out what I want to do. I believe I want to work for business in human resources but also I want to work for an nonprofit organization. That way I feel that I could help someone and make me feel better about myself. The final promise is finding my faith back to the church.

In this journal I will type down what is happening or had happen or will happen in months to come.